I mean this figuratively of course. I’m not asking you to literally have an image of an elephant in a room or an actual elephant in the room for that matter. The phrase of “the Elephant in the room” is to point to the obvious. It doesn’t matter how much you dress up the elephant or how much you try to hide it. It’s still there.
Every day when I go to work, I get to identify and solve, what I think are very obvious problems. The problems are right there. It doesn’t matter how we sugar-coat them, or try to paint a picture that they aren’t. They persist. So why the persistence, of the problems. Are we incapable of remedying the problem ? is it within our control to affect a solution ? Well, sometimes no it isn’t. However, there are often times the problem is totally within our control. So, why don’t we do anything about it ?
I worked with a gal on one project and she gave me a very valuable piece of information. She said that people are very reluctant to change. In fact she said “Most people will not change unless it’s a 9”. I understood immediately what she meant. If you have ever had the misfortune to end up in the hospital or in Emergency, at some point a doctor will ask you a very simple question. “On a scale of 1 to 10, what is your level of pain?”. What this means is that unless something is very painful, then most people are reluctant to change anything. So why the reluctance ? Everyone has their own reason/rationale, and whatever your reason, those are your reasons, and I’m not here to judge you on this. However, I want to give you some food for thought.
Firstly, if you think you are hiding behind your elephant. Chances are, you are not. Those who know you, love you, and take the time to understand you, will know. So why aren’t those people telling you about this ? Well, just like any good parent or friend, sometimes you have to learn how to fall first. Some of my most epic mistakes have ended up being some of my largest areas for growth in my life.
“You don’t learn to walk by following rules. You learn by doing, and by falling over.”
Secondly, What is your elephant ? Do you know ? Do you have one ? You may have done such a good job at disguising your elephant over the years, that you no longer recognize it. That doesn’t mean it isn’t there…
If you think you have an elephant, I think the first thing you need to do is to identify what your elephant is. Figuring that out, and then determining how to address it are the first steps. After that, falling is pretty easy. I didn’t say it wasn’t going to hurt. There are going to be failures along the way, but it’s the failures that builds character. You become a richer person due to the failures, and if you are concerned about your ego, I wouldn’t worry about it… the family and friends that love you, won’t care about your ego. They’ll love the person you are becoming as you relocate your elephant.